I opened my mouth
I noticed them sitting there
as orderly as frozen fish
in a package. Slowly water began to fill the room
though I did not notice it
till it reached
my ears
and then I heard the sounds
of fish in a aquarium
and I knew that though I had
tried to drown them
with my words
that they had only opened up
like gills for them
and let me in.
Together we swam around the room
like thirty tails whacking words
till the bell rang
puncturing
a hole in the door
where we all leaked out
They went to another class
I suppose and I home
where Queen Elizabeth
my cat met me
and licked my fins
till they were hands again.
REACTION: Based on the title and the apparent metaphor, I can conclude that the narrator is describing an encounter between a poem and his class. While it is not apparent what poem he may be talking about, it is a guess that he is talking about a poem which contains fish or aquariums.
PARAPHRASE: Before we began, they sat there in orderly rows unmoving. Slowly, they became more intrigued as I began to read, though I did not notice for a while. Even though I had tried to bombard the class with poems, they began to open up to them and absorb and understand what was being said. Then, we could analysis the poem as a class, opening up a discussion for everyone to join. The bell came as a disturbance when it suddenly burst the conversation. They students moved onto their next class, and I went home to my cat where I where I thought about the poem until I could no more.
SWIFTT:
-SW: For word choice, the author uses a few words that show that the poem is aimed to an audience of teenage students. For example, he repeats “till” which is a common teenage slang term to mean until. Also, the author uses grammar that mirrors teenage style of informal writing. He uses no commas and run-on sentences with minimal periods in his poem. Also, when looking at the syntax, the author does not use any particular rhyme scheme or meter.
-I/F: This poem uses visual imagery mainly through its major metaphor. Throughout the whole poem, the understanding of the poem read in class is compared to fish either frozen and rigid or in an aquarium. At first, the author describes the kids as ‘frozen fish in a package’ which gives a visual to the rigid, uncomfortable order. Next, the author describes the sound of fish in an aquarium for the whispers of the students once they start to absorb the poem. The author next references the gills that open up. The imagery from this parallels the action of the students’ minds opening to the poem suddenly and sharply, like a fishes gills will do once the fish hits the water. After the students’ minds open, the ‘fishes begin to swim around the room with thirty tails whacking words.’ This imagery helps the reader visualize the conversation about the poem. The movement of the conversation is explained in the swimming around the room to different points like a school of fish will do when food hits the water. The conversation points are then taken on by the ‘thirty tails whacking words’ because each person would be discussing and interjecting points. The bell puncturing the door is great imagery for the shrill, sudden sound of a bell. The last imagery used in the poem closes the metaphor that runs through the poem. The narrator of the poem goes home where his cat, which is a common enemy to fish, ‘licks his fins until they turn back into hands.’ This creates an image of an actual cat licking a fish and closing the metaphor by distracting the narrators mind off of the poem.
-T: This poem has a very playful tone reinforced by the playful metaphor and syntax of the poem. The author is writing this poem to what seems to be an audience of teenage students. In order to meet the audience, the writer uses slang terms in diction and easy to follow syntax.
-T: The theme of this poem is definitely education and journey. The setting of a school opens up the theme for education. The students are in class when the narrator begins to read a poem. The way the students open up to the poem and begin to analysis as shown through the fish metaphor shows that they are being exposed to and learning about poetry. Then, there is a theme of a journey in union with the theme of education. The description of the students at the beginning of the poem leads the reader to believe that they were not enthusiastic about the poetry. However, this began to change once the students started to actually hear and understand the poem. By the end of the poem, the whole class is joining in on a discussion of the poem that was read, showing a significant journey from the uninterested, unenthusiastic attitude to the openly participating, seemingly excited students.
CONCLUSION: I think that my first reaction was very close, but upon analyzing the poem, a few points of the poem became clearer. At first, I assumed the narrator to be the teacher, but a few phrases show that the narrator was a visitor. The main one showing this was “They went to another class/ I suppose and I home.” I also see now that the poem may not necessarily been about fishes, seas, or aquariums. The poem does not give any clear clues to the actual poem being read at all, in fact, nor does it state if one poem or multiple were read and discussed. My first instinct about the metaphors can also be elaborated. In the reaction, I stated that the metaphor was simple, but that was not the case. While the metaphor carried throughout the whole poem was easily seen at first, the little details were not, like the bubbles of the fishes for the whispers or the school like aspect of swimming from topic to topic. Overall, I really enjoyed this poem and found it easily relatable, most likely due the audience to which it was aimed.
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